Archive for the ‘Life Purpose’ Category

Nothing is life is wasted.  Do you really believe that? I mean deep down in your soul, do you believe that?IMG_2123

I was discussing this very topic over coffee with a friend just recently. I was sharing my past/current life dilemma with her. (Bet she no idea I was going to write about it!) Man, what would our lives be like without our soul friends?

I was trying to explain to her how I have been feeling. It’s as though I have been in a wrestling match with God, and have been wondering what this past year if not the past several years of my life have been about.

Have you ever felt this way?

Here’s a bit of the back story.  Several years ago I believed that God had asked me to take a specific path/direction in my life.  However, the last few years this path has had so many obstacles I found myself taking one step forward and 500 backwards!  Oh the drama!

So I asked God again and again, and again, ” if this wasn’t the path you wanted me to take, then what were these past few years all about?

This summer was the tipping point. I had to get away and spend some time alone with God. I had to find some answers, so I went where my heart always leads me – to the mountains. I went to St. Walburga Abbey and stayed there for several days. During this time God did a miraculous work in my IMG_0215heart (I’ll save that for another story.)

I began to see that I had been way too attached and holding too tightly to this path.  It was time to let go (not quit) but to let go of the direction I believed this path was going to take me.

Then the grieving stage set in. I was feeling loss, I was angry, I was depressed. Again, I asked God, if this wasn’t the path you wanted me to take, then what were these past few years all about?  You see, I’m one of those people who is pretty stubborn. Or should I say hard headed. Just ask my husband! I learn the hard way and I want to see how the dots connect in life.

This is where we pick up the story about having coffee with my friend. She said to me, “Pam, nothing is wasted in your life.”  The deeper meaning being, God does not waste our pain, our experiences, our joys or our sorrows.

I have to say, I didn’t really want to absorb this or think about it this way.  It sort of reminded me of the old churchy cliché,  you know the one…”this is God preparing you for something bigger and better in your life.” By the way, I used my James Earl Jones voice for that.

However, after I got past all my freaky reactions and excuses, I began to realize that she was right. God doesn’t waste anything in our life. He uses what we think is a waste somehow and really it’s not up to us to decide how He should use it. We don’t have to see or understand how the dot’s connect, we just need to trust that God is connecting them.

Here’s the way God has begun to shift my mindset and open my heart around all this. Even though the old question (what were the past few years all about), still comes up from time to time, I can now look at it and say this…

Maybe, the past few years of struggle were actually gifts in my life. They were not wasted nor were they random. And maybe right now is a gift. I want to accept this gift in a way that it becomes part of the continuing story of God’s work in my life and in the life of others.

Perhaps God is just trying to tell me that the journey is not over, it’s just unfolding and it’s going to be different.

Thank you my friend for sharing your wisdom with me.

Till next time,

By the way, if you share a similar experience in your life, I’d love to hear about it and I’m sure other readers would as well. Just place your comment below.


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by Pam Day

I know you have been sitting on the edge of your seat waiting for an update on our patio project.

Here are a few pictures of our progress thus far. There’s Brian, patiently and carefully putting the pieces of flag stone into just the proper spot.IMG_0159 IMG_0161 IMG_0160

I haven’t been helping with this part of the project. This stage is pretty much a one man job.

My part right now is to observe, encourage and get the heck out of the way!  And of course write about it!

As I was standing on my observation deck (inside, looking out the patio door, drinking my wine) it occurred to me how these pieces of flagstone resemble the puzzle pieces of our lives.

We are constantly trying to decide, choose, cut and fit just the right pieces of our lives into just the right spot to create a lovely mosaic. Okay, maybe I had too much wine!

Seriously though, sometimes life can feel like an intricate puzzle. If you are like me, I often wonder what the heck God is up to and how in the world He plans to fit all the pieces together.Puzzle piece blog

Four types of life’s puzzles pieces come to mind. (Yes, there are many more but I am writing a blog post, not a novel.)  See if you can relate to any of them.

1.  The “FORCE IT” piece of the puzzle.  This is the piece of us that is determined to have our lives all figured out, all our ducks in a row.

It’s that piece that we CRAM into place and MAKE fit no matter what.

Then we wonder why there are times when the corners of the piece crumble off, or the middle will fracture because it is pressed into too tight of a spot.

That doesn’t seem to hinder us though, we just fill in cracks with sand and cover it up. Then we pray to God it, or should I say we, won’t fall apart.

2.  The “I DON’T FIT” piece of the puzzle. This is the piece of us that frantically runs around like a chicken with its head cut off.

Oh man this takes me back to my younger days when we raised chickens.  Not a pretty sight when they don’t have heads! Okay, I digress… where was I… oh yes, chickens, heads.

We flit around from one place to the other, DESPERATELY trying to find our spot in life.

We put our piece into a spot and then we get all worried about what people will think of us if we stay in this spot.

We want to please them right? So we decide that it’s not the perfect spot so we jump into another spot.  We never seem to be able to land and find our spot, or figure out who we really are.

3.  The “HOLD ON TIGHT” piece of the puzzle. This is the piece that sometimes we don’t even want to look at. Many times it’s the hardest piece to break or cut into the right shape.

It’s those unhealthy habits we have adopted and those limiting beliefs we have internalized. It’s those areas of resentment we are holding onto.

4.  The “IN SYNC” piece of the puzzle. When we choose to let go, accept change, and allow God to cut the piece into the size and shape that He wants, we find freedom and our life flows.

We can trust that all the puzzle pieces of our life fit together into the perfect spots in His plan.

I heard a quote not long ago that I LOVE! It’s by Francis Chan. Perhaps it will encourage you. “God created you and placed you in this time for His purposes.”

Guess what? You fit! You have a purpose and a spot or many spots to fill along your life’s journey. When we each put our purpose into place we build the puzzle together and create something beautiful.

Till next time,



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Have you ever felt as if you were standing at the crossroads in your life, wondering which path to choose? I know I have.  Sometimes it can feel like a big adventure and sometimes it’s scares the begeezees out of us. Created by Pam Day Paths of Discovery Life Coaching

Here’s a picture I drew a few years ago that portrays some of my major life choices.  I call it “Standing At The Crossroads.” Behind each path you see in this picture there is a story– my  story. 

I won’t go into great detail here, but the path by the church that you see on the right represents the small minded, legalistic Christian world I lived in.
The path that goes into the forest
was the dark, hopeless, entangled mess I lived in.

The path by the tree and the castle is where I find myself living now.  The tree has the keys to the countless doors that are inside the castle – so many doors, so many opportunities.  And behind the opportunities lie our choices.  

I have noticed, depending on where I am in my journey, that I have 3 default scenarios that I will choose. Can you relate to them?

Scenario #1: I cautiously choose a key from the tree and go into the castle. I find the door, insert the key into the lock, open the door, look inside and see amazing opportunities. 

However, I choose to promptly close the door and run back outside to sit under the tree. This choice was too overwhelming or too scary to walk into and experience.

Scenario #2:  I sit under the tree and ignore the path that leads to the castle. As I sit I start to worry. Then I start to feel anxious and get all crazy in my head.

The keys are dangling in my face, but I push them aside because I feel confused and overwhelmed about which one to choose. Therefore I choose nothing. I sit and sit, get up walk around the tree and then sit some more. I can’t seem to make a choice so I become stressed, burned out and stuck.

Scenario #3:  I confidently choose the key, unlock the door, walk in and bask in the opportunity that is inside waiting for me. While I’m inside I learn new things, meet new people and experience new adventures. I re-align with my purpose and relationship with God. This choice leaves me feeling renewed and energized and moving forward. 

Choices, we have so many and yet sometimes we feel like we have none. It’s a strange paradox.

It all boils down to this… if we are going to walk fully in who we are created to be and do what we are created to do, we have to make a choice.  Sometimes the choice is challenging, scary and downright hard. Sometimes we need support and help to make this choice.

So, here’s your chance to tell us what scenario or what path you have been on lately. Perhaps you have no trouble sharing where you are or maybe it feels scary and uncomfortable.

Who knows perhaps choosing to comment will empower you on the path you are on, and/or propel you towards the path you want to be on. Asking you to step more fully into who you are and out of your comfort zone is what I do and I know you can do it!

Here’s your chance. Confidently grab the key and write your comment below about what scenario or path you find yourself on right now.  Whoo Ahh!

Till next time,


Pam Day is owner/founder of Paths of Discovery Life Coaching.  She is committed to helping you transform your life through life coaching and spiritual direction.  Her passion is to inspire you to wake up to your life! Step out of burn out and infuse each day with new purpose. Discover who God has created you to be and begin pursuing the dream He has created you to do.

Read more about how coaching and spiritual direction can help you find your way back onto your path at- oh and while you are there grab your free copy of the Tolerations Discovery Tool. 



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I am often asked the question, so… uh… you’re a Life and Spiritual Direction Coach? What in the world is that and how does it work? Based on the look on their faces I sometimes wonder if they think I’m going to wave a magic wand and sprinkle fairy dust on them or something.magic wand

Perhaps you are having some of the same questions. So today I am going to dig out my magic wand and tell you a short story. No it’s not a fairy tale, but it is an amazing, true story of how God showed up in one of my client’s life. The cool thing about this story is that it represents the stories of most all of my clients. NOTE: Names have been changed for privacy sake.

Meet Bob: Our first meeting went like this…

Pam: So Bob, tell me some of the things that are going on in your life that you want coaching for.

Bob: To be very honest I feel stuck and unhappy and have felt this way for a while now. I feel like I have lost my way and I really have no idea how to rediscover it. My career has taken over my life and my marriage is burning out. As for God, I’m not sure he’s even there anymore. I need to figure out a way to find balance in it all. I want to rekindle my relationship with my wife and find out where God is in all this. I need to find purpose and passion in my life again. Is my situation something you work with in coaching?

The answer to Bob’s question was YES and below is a brief description of how coaching worked for him.

Our coaching sessions were done by phone because Bob was out of state. I created a customized plan that included exploration of God’s vision, and tools to help Bob discover his Spiritual gifts, passions and strengths. I gave him training to uncover limiting mindsets and beliefs about himself and God. We created an action plan to implement into his daily life that helped him find balance with his career, home and Spiritual life. I helped him learn new ways to communicate effectively and rekindle his relationship with his wife.

Within months Bob saw huge changes in his life.

Am I hearing you say, “Pam all this sounds very serious and that kind of scares me.” Yes we do some serious stuff in the kind of coaching I do. Why? Because it’s core, soul stuff, it’s the kind of stuff that transforms your life. HOWEVER, it’s not all serious. Bob and I had a BLAST seeing God show up and watching his life change right before his eyes. Here, read Bob’s words for yourself…

Bob: My life is totally different today. I am now enjoying the most intimate relationship with Jesus I have ever had. I have learned how to prioritize Him back into my life. My life has changed in so many ways as the direction and purpose for my life has been uncovered! I have learned how to communicate and love my wife the way that she deserves, and treat those around me the way that God intended. I am motivated and am enjoying work, but have prioritized it where it belongs (behind God and family). Coaching and Spiritual Direction has helped me to communicate with God in new ways … has truly helped me to let go, and let God … and has taught me to be able to see His hand at work in my everyday life.

Okay, I’m putting my magic wand back in its holder. See, all that wasn’t too woo woo was it.

I have the most amazing clients and the best job in the world! I am so grateful and honored to be a part of God’s bigger plan and purposefully use who He has created me to be to help people move forward in their lives!

Coaching is a game changer in my client’s lives. It was a game changer in my own life. Because of this, I want to give you an opportunity to experience what it’s all about.

Right now I have a few openings in my coaching practice. So I am inviting you to sign up for a free, get-acquainted session with me. I want you to have this opportunity because I am confident it will be a game changer in your life as well!

All you need to do to get your free, get-acquainted session is sign up HERE and I will contact you with the details. Don’t worry; I will never ever, ever share your information with anyone. I will guard it with my life! Easy peasy!
Here’s the LINK again in case you missed it.
I can’t wait to talk with you!


Oh yeah, I forgot to say… THE END!

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Pam Day in owner/founder of Paths of Discovery Life Coaching.  Pam is committed to helping you transform your life through life coaching and Spiritual direction.

Her passion is to inspire you to wake up to your life! Step out of burn out and infuse each day with new purpose. Discover who God has created you to be and begin pursuing the dream He has created you to do.

Read more about how coaching and spiritual direction can help you find your way back onto your path at:


Please feel free to forward or share with your friends.  See below.  Thank you so much!

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A few weeks ago I saw the movie, “Avatar.”  I know I’m a little behind the times but at least I don’t have my 80’s big hair!

What stood out to me from this movie was the line, “I See You.”  Wow.  How would our lives be different if in every interaction we silently said, “I See You?”  No I’m not playing peek – a – boo.

Here’s a true personal story that helps bring this concept home.  into the depths

A few months ago I was at the liquor store.  Yes I admit I am a wine and beer snob.  After I made my purchase of a lovely bottle of wine, I walked out the door to make my way to my car.

Outside the door sitting on the sidewalk was a lady.  She had some homemade jewelry in front of her that she was trying to sell.  I will be honest and admit in a matter of 2 seconds I made a judgment about her, her jewelry, and the liquor store’s policies. I presumed she was homeless and I was astonished that the store would allow peddling outside their store.

In that moment, I had some decisions to make.

a.  I could turn around, go back inside the store and inquire about their policy. That’s a fancy way of saying I could complain about the woman. However, I wouldn’t do because I’m too chicken.
b.  I could follow the lead of the other of the customers and head straight for the parking lot, sneak behind the cars, and hope that she would not see me. Sadly, this is something I have done on occasion.

But then I heard her voice.  She said, please come look at the things I made.  I felt the nudge; you know that internal nudge from God that says, “Do it”, even though you don’t “feel like it?”  Even though you are “way too busy?”  Even though you have your own “opinions “(judgments) about it?

So, I went over and looked at her stuff. Yes, she really wanted me to buy something. No I didn’t buy it.  Maybe I should have.  But what I did do was talk with her – just briefly – and do you know what she said? Thank you so much for at least looking at me and my jewelry.  In that moment, I knew why God nudged me.  She needed to be seen. 

If we got really honest with ourselves, we would have to admit that we have the need to be seen at some level in our lives.  Perhaps we are trying to gain approval of a parent or friend, or desperately trying to gain the unconditional love of a spouse.

Maybe we are seeking acknowledgement or self-value through our careers, or running around frantically trying to be “super-woman/man.”

I ask you again, “How would our lives be different if we silently said, “I See You? “

What if, every time I got angry with my husband (I know, shocking!) I silently said to myself, I See You.

What if every time I am too preoccupied with my own life or just “too busy,” I took a moment to See.

What if I Saw others without so much judgment or preconceived notions and remembered that God Sees them, and loves them.

What if – and here’s the big one – I could See myself as God Sees Me, through His eyes of unconditional love.

Check out this song, one of my favorites.


Till next time,



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“Pathway of Love”

Four years ago my husband Brian and I had the amazing opportunity to visit Italy for our 25th anniversary.  It was the best getaway I have ever had and was a life changing experience. I want to share with you one of my favorite outings (although every moment was a favorite there!)


 It was a hike between the quaint Cinque Terra villages.  The Via Dell Amore’ section of the hike seems appropriate to share with you this Valentine’s Day.


Here’s the short version of the story. “The Cinque Terre towns were extremely isolated until the last century.  After the blasting of the second train line in the 1920s, a trail was made between the first two towns: Riomaggiore and Manarola. Villagers rarely married anyone from outside their town, so the trail became established as a lovers’ meeting point for boys and girls from the two towns.

Apparently, landslides frequently keep the pathway closed, so I felt really grateful it was open while we were there.  The scenery was unbelievable as was the construction of this path and tunnel.


There is a tradition to take a padlock with you on your trek. Closing a padlock with your lover onto a cable or railing at a lovey-dovey spot, seals/locks your love together.
(read the whole story here)


Best to you and your lovely dovey this Valentine’s Day. Know that you are loved first and foremost by God and by the many people whose lives you touch! Salute’!  (Cheers!)


By the way, if you are looking for me I’m on the first flight back to Italy.  All this reminiscing is making me antsy to go back!

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Blog post 2-2-14

God Made Me to Be a Somebody Destined to Achieve Great Things!

Hmmm… What are your first thoughts when you read this statement?

This statement is from the book The Dream Giver by Bruce Wilkinson.  Mr. Wilkinson challenges us to pursue the big dream that The Dream Giver has placed in our hearts.

I’ve been working with this statement in my own life the past few weeks.  Hence the creation of this bookmark in the picture above.  I started out strong, loving the colors and design effects of the background. The first two lines – God Made Me to Be A – were just how I envisioned, straight and bold.

Then I got to the word Somebody.  Hmmm, feeling a little less strong now.  I wanted this word to be a bit different from the rest. Interestingly, I think I unconsciously made it this way because that is so much of how I roll – just a little differently.

As I pressed on, the words destined to achieve – got a bit shaky and wonky.  I think this is telling about how I feel about God using me to achieve great things for Him.  I feel a bit shaky about what this might look like and get all wonky in my head.

That wonkiness is what I call “limiting thoughts” going round and round in my brain.  Thoughts like “Yeah right, seriously? God use me to do great things for Him? My husband calls this “stinkin thinkin” and even wrote a song about it. I know, I know, “way to put in a little plug for Brian.”

I ended up fairly strong though with the words Great Things, albeit a little off kilter. Hey, I’m okay with that!

After all my deep analysis about this silly little tag, I’ve decided to look at this statement the way I believe God sees it.  I’m guessing He could have said this same statement to Moses, Abraham, Paul, Peter – the list could go on.

Insert Darth Vader’s voice here, “Moses, I have created you to be a Somebody, destined to achieve great things.” Moses had the same reactions we have, “Seriously? Do you remember who you are talking to God?  Me a Nobody?”  But in the end look how God used Moses for crying out loud!

Just think if we were to really allow this statement to soak deep into our souls. There is no telling what God would do through us to make an impact on the world for Him.   If you have been reading my blogs for very long, you know I always invite you to do a little coaching with me.  So here’s your chance to take this statement and play the “what if” game.

  • What if you believed that God created you to be a Somebody and has given you a dream to pursue?
  • What if you believed that your dream could achieve great things for Him?
  • What if 2014 was your year to pursue your big dream?  How would your life be different?

If you are ready to take your answers a step further I invite you to check out the 14ers Club – Reaching to New Heights in Your Life.  The courageous climbers that gathered in January are going strong and we are having a blast!

New groups are forming again this month! We will band together for a journey up our metaphorical 14er and explore the dream that God has given each of us.  If you are interested in knowing the details just click HERE or click the clip board below.  Easy peasy!

Sign Up for The 14ers Club

Sign Up for The 14ers Club

Happy Climbing!


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