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Posts Tagged ‘life is a waste’

Nothing is life is wasted.  Do you really believe that? I mean deep down in your soul, do you believe that?IMG_2123

I was discussing this very topic over coffee with a friend just recently. I was sharing my past/current life dilemma with her. (Bet she no idea I was going to write about it!) Man, what would our lives be like without our soul friends?

I was trying to explain to her how I have been feeling. It’s as though I have been in a wrestling match with God, and have been wondering what this past year if not the past several years of my life have been about.

Have you ever felt this way?

Here’s a bit of the back story.  Several years ago I believed that God had asked me to take a specific path/direction in my life.  However, the last few years this path has had so many obstacles I found myself taking one step forward and 500 backwards!  Oh the drama!

So I asked God again and again, and again, ” if this wasn’t the path you wanted me to take, then what were these past few years all about?

This summer was the tipping point. I had to get away and spend some time alone with God. I had to find some answers, so I went where my heart always leads me – to the mountains. I went to St. Walburga Abbey and stayed there for several days. During this time God did a miraculous work in my IMG_0215heart (I’ll save that for another story.)

I began to see that I had been way too attached and holding too tightly to this path.  It was time to let go (not quit) but to let go of the direction I believed this path was going to take me.

Then the grieving stage set in. I was feeling loss, I was angry, I was depressed. Again, I asked God, if this wasn’t the path you wanted me to take, then what were these past few years all about?  You see, I’m one of those people who is pretty stubborn. Or should I say hard headed. Just ask my husband! I learn the hard way and I want to see how the dots connect in life.

This is where we pick up the story about having coffee with my friend. She said to me, “Pam, nothing is wasted in your life.”  The deeper meaning being, God does not waste our pain, our experiences, our joys or our sorrows.

I have to say, I didn’t really want to absorb this or think about it this way.  It sort of reminded me of the old churchy cliché,  you know the one…”this is God preparing you for something bigger and better in your life.” By the way, I used my James Earl Jones voice for that.

However, after I got past all my freaky reactions and excuses, I began to realize that she was right. God doesn’t waste anything in our life. He uses what we think is a waste somehow and really it’s not up to us to decide how He should use it. We don’t have to see or understand how the dot’s connect, we just need to trust that God is connecting them.

Here’s the way God has begun to shift my mindset and open my heart around all this. Even though the old question (what were the past few years all about), still comes up from time to time, I can now look at it and say this…

Maybe, the past few years of struggle were actually gifts in my life. They were not wasted nor were they random. And maybe right now is a gift. I want to accept this gift in a way that it becomes part of the continuing story of God’s work in my life and in the life of others.

Perhaps God is just trying to tell me that the journey is not over, it’s just unfolding and it’s going to be different.

Thank you my friend for sharing your wisdom with me.

Till next time,

By the way, if you share a similar experience in your life, I’d love to hear about it and I’m sure other readers would as well. Just place your comment below.

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